expected the unexpected out of me. please.

dear diary,

i cannot face him anymore. i don't want to meet/see him.
i just can't do it now.

the times have changed and now i'm going to start blogging more often than not.

2010

i got a clearer picture of what i want and how i am going to achieve it. nothing can stop me this time although there are still things that no matter how hard i try, i still can't get it. this is undeniable fact. i don't want to have false hopes, i want something concrete.

i hardly been at home, from mon to sun. i am always out until i'm no longer eating dinner at home. for now, my parents know they did wrongs on my childhood days that affected me somehow. * i can't get over it.

will you support me if i make this decision that will shock you? i fear to tell you the truth that this is something which i wanted badly, i hope you won't take it so badly. missing out your daughter, for i am going away soon. * it's not that i want to leave them but this is for my own personal growth, my own good.

ok nights.

samantha

dear -

now i'm 21 years old.

the start of my adult life journey, my mum went with me to Taiwan and she knows what am i like. finally there is something an eye opener to her. she seems assured. that's something new.

i am re-blogging my blog after it's been abandoned for so long.

something interesting to share. i got a funny dream today, it seems surreal. a dream i have never dreamt about before. everyday is working and going out. i have been exercising lately because i felt that my health is not very good. it's because i worked in hospital and witnessed a lot of patients with different types of health problems.

being jogging lately, night time mostly.

i forget i have forget that i must read.

btw, all my post are random because my mind is always on the move. whatever i can think of, i'll just jot them down.

take care.

i'm going to watch videos for entertainment.

byes.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2010!

it has been a long time since i have stopped blogging. it's all due to the blog site errors keep giving me unnecessary errors. as usual, i am on the move every now and then.

a new year and new beginning.

i should very long time stop having to the impossible to come true, as if there's anything i can do to make it happen. even though you have worked hard for it, you just cannot change the person's hearts. this is something that is way beyond your imagination.

for the year 2009, there are many ups and downs. at times, i could barely recognize myself anymore. i am still trying my best to be true to myself, not someone else telling me what to do. it's difficult.

for now, i doesn't want to think anymore and enjoy my life now by staying up in my bed with my laptop by my side. when i started working, i hardly using the internet and surf the rubbish(according to my dad).

* I REGRET I DELETED MY BLOG FROM 2008.

it holds memories about my struggles in poly and how tiring it was for my heart to hold. there's nothing more to expect than faster to graduate and leave the horrible school. times passed so fast that i can hardly remember times anymore. so i am jotting down to make an effort in remembering those times i had.